Groundhog Day - again

Evidently there is someone out there that is living a lonelier, misbegotten, wasted, miserable, life than I currently am, because I heard someone has asked what was going on, I hadn’t posted my blog on Sunday. Get a life! I’ve also become aware there are some unregistered followers (voyeures) who have been following my blog. I hope you’re following my blog as a concerned friend and you are truly interested in my quick and complete recovery. It certainly can’t be because of the writing.

Well, I was a little busy this weekend, I ventured out twice with Terry. Saturday, we went out to run a few errands and make a pilgrimage to Sam’s Club (it’s not the weekend unless we visit Sam’s). On Sunday we went on a shopping expedition for a Black & Decker battery operated, hand held leaf blower. That took 3 stores. We also visited the local nursery to replenish a few plants and to get some herbs.

So, that doesn’t sound like much, but it took a lot out of me and instead of blogging, I took a nap.

Back to the adventure . . .

Terry returned from Green Bay on Monday (an uneventful return trip), the beasties and I were happy to see her and listen to her stories of the grand birthday celebration for her mother.

I made further progress weaning myself off the dreaded narcotic Percocet and actually managed 2 days where I didn’t take any Percs. Notice I only said 2 days. I don’t know if it’s the nature of the healing process or I was operating on residual pain killer, but those two days were relatively pain free, then the pain level went up and I resorted to a modest application of pain relief from Percocet again. I’m down to 1 or 2 a day now with the addition of Tylenol or Ibuprofen. (I’ve got 30 Percocet left, and Dr. Akins didn’t sound like he was inclined to extend my prescription past that remaining amount.)

I’ve visited with all three of my doctors this week and they all seem pleased with my on going recovery, I on the other hand am unimpressed. I expected a much quicker recovery, but it doesn’t seem to be in the cards. I have been gauging my treatment and recovery on how the outside of my neck has reacted to the radiation treatment. The first 10 days or so of my treatment I couldn’t tell much was going on. As time went on my neck began to display signs of the radiation burn and it reached it’s height about 5 – 10 days after my last treatment. I had a serious looking sun burn on my neck. Check out the earlier posted pictures. I could tell by what was going on on the outside of my neck serious things were going on inside my throat. The pain in my throat increased with the obvious damage going on outside on my neck. Once the treatment was over and my neck started to show signs of healing, I figured the same healing was going on in my throat. Nope, not so much.

I can’t explain what’s going on in my throat. One day the upper part of my throat will be sore, the next day the lower part of my throat will be sore, some days my tongue is very sensitive and some days I think I’m making good progress. The next day I’m reaching for the Percocet. And of course I’m fed up and frustrated with the amount of slimy thick mucus saliva. I could stand at the sink and gargle 24 hours a day and still never clear all that crap out of my throat. The doctors tell me it should clear up in a few weeks, or it could hang on for a few months, or maybe never fully clear up. I love it when they are so precise.

Two items of note: One, I returned to the gym today. It’s been about 4 weeks since I last went, mainly due to the radiation burn on my neck. I have lost a lot of weight and my energy level is way down and I know the only way to take care of that is to get back in the gym and start eating better. Which brings me to two; I’ve started eating one meal a day of regular solid food. My sense of taste is returning, ever so slightly, but returning. If I medicate just right and accept a level of serious discomfort I’m able to finish a modest amount of a regular sized meal. On Saturday I made Salmon and grilled vegetables, on Sunday I grilled steak and potatoes and added some of the grilled vegetables left from Saturday. Monday evening we ate left-over’s from Saturday and Sunday. I must say it tasted fine (thanks to the chef), and I did manage to eat about a ladies portion of each meal. But, it was torture. I did not enjoy any of those three meals.

It marks a step forward. I’m not sure why I decided to try solid food, other than I am thoroughly fed up with the pureed gruel I’ve been subsisting on for the last 4 weeks. Maybe somewhere in the back of my mind I’m thinking if I act like everything is normal again then maybe my recovery will accelerate and match my actions. Will my mouth to get better. We’ll see.

Dr. Eller, the doctor that diagnosed my cancer, has taken over my recovery and future treatment. I saw him for the first time since January, when we were deciding what my treatment should be. Both Doctors Richard and Akins will not see me again for 2 – 3 months, to follow-up on my chemo/radiation side effects. So they have pretty much turned me back over to Dr. Eller. When I saw him last Friday, he did a very thorough examination and scoped my throat. There was no sign of the tumor on my tongue (woo, hooo !!!!) He is cautiously optimistic things are going well. We plan on scheduling a full body PET scan sometime in late June or early July to search for any other occurrences of cancer. He did reiterate my prognosis is good and if the PET scan comes back negative, I’ve got a very good chance of spending a good number of years enjoying a healthy long life. (this is where everyone crosses their fingers)

I plan on returning to work this week, probably on Wednesday. I figure half days at first, then we’ll see how it goes next week. I hope to make it as easy on my co-workers as possible. I’ll try and not fall asleep at my desk, I will not put anything in my feeding tube while at my desk, and I’ll try and keep the spitting to a minimum. (maybe I’ll borrow one of Stu’s spit canteens)

Let me close by going back to the first paragraph. This hasn’t been a fun experience and it’s far from over, and I thank you for checking in on me, I am humbled. But I’ve spent enough time roaming around the Wilford Hall Medical Center on Lackland Air Force Base to know I’m in pretty good shape compared to many others also roaming the halls of that hospital. Many are retired veterans and some recovering wounded, young airmen having just entered the Air Force going to sick call for the first time, that uncounted number of devoted dependants that followed (or are following) their spouses around the world and one hell of a dedicated group of medical professionals bent on getting us all through our medical misfortunes. It makes me feel a bit insignificant, and yet, proud to be a member of that rabble.

Check back next week.
Miller, out